Please don’t hate me for not throwing a party on your first birthday

Dear Son,

Just because somebody doesn’t follow a trend about an event doesn’t mean she doesn’t care. People have different customs and the way they cherish something. Your father and I don’t come from a family that celebrates first birthday. Your grandparents annually forget their wedding anniversaries. My siblings and I do not attend our university graduation. You just happen to be born in a family that doesn’t celebrate much. Only a few that really matters. But we are joyous folks.  And we respect and enjoy people’s big days.

You’re more than a creature who looks like me. Your father and I are glad to know that your birth has become a huge blessing, not only for us but also the whole big family.  You know the feeling when you try making a pizza for the first time and turns out everyone loves it? That, times 1000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000.

I feel that our big family gets together more often now. Your bude, tante, and oom seem to put more effort to come home every weekend so they can see you. Your grandparents have something that could (well, sometimes) distract them from their daily fight. You make your parents happy. You make me feel that I mean so much to somebody. It’s rare.

You really are the light of wisdom that brings family together.

Just like what your name means.

(Well, sort of).

Anyway, on your birthday I prayed for you longer than usual, and I was relieved I managed to keep you alive for 365 days! Also, I tried baking several baby-friendly cakes for you. They actually tasted decent but weren’t very instagramable. And I offered you some but you didn’t seem to like it. So I decided to eat them all. I’m sorry, Son. Next year I will do better (and you should be able to help me in the kitchen).

Those were supposed to be apple rose cake which got burned and pumpkin cupcakes dough that taste better before getting into the oven 

 

Soooo. Happy turning one! I should’ve posted this like, almost a hundred days ago, but you kept me busy. See how I prioritize you over social media? :p

Okay. You caught me making excuses. But I honestly believe you shouldn’t wait for a certain day to be thankful for something.

Here’s to celebrate 1 year and almost 3 months of your life! And to 31 years and a month of your father’s life! And to two years something of your parents surviving their marriage! And to everything in life that is wonderful and sometimes taken for granted! Cheers!

Oh dear, we love you so much.

XO,

Butopik & husband

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Categories: Awkward Mother | Leave a comment

IMD is like a seeing a pocong. You hear some people admit to have ever experienced it, but you don’t hear it from the ones around you.

Dear Son,

You may skip this post if you decide not to get married and/or have children. But if you do, please google “initiation of breastfeeding”, or “breast crawl”, or Inisiasi Menyusu Dini (IMD). Then make sure that you take your part seriously, because breastfeeding success is subject to teamwork; a mother and her support system.

I don’t know what will happen in the next 25-30 years, but in my time, breastmilk is scientifically proven to be the best food for newborns, and the world is encouraging mothers to breastfeed their children. There have been tips and advices on how to breastfeed successfully. Most of the words I heard are: “You can do it!”, “It’s a natural process, every mother can do it!”, and “If a bitch can breastfeed her puppies, so can you!”.

Nah, I made the last one up, but the first two are real and your wife will get that a lot. If she’s like me, you better be careful with your choice of words. To me, those words can be encouraging and burdening at the same time. I’m the kind of woman who would think, “What if my breastmilk won’t come out? Have I done something wrong? My child will be starving! Good Lord, I’m a terrible mother!” and stress everything out.

 

“Mamas, newborns are smart enough to find their mother’s nipple”. ARE YOU SAYING MY BABY IS STUPID??

During my clinical study in med school, I got a lecture from a senior doctor who was also a famous breastfeeding counsellor. She taught me how dramatic and natural it was for a baby to crawl and find his mother’s nipple. It really got in my mind and so just until a month before you were born, I kept imagined how easy it would be to breastfeed you. Because IT’S NATURAL, they said. BABIES ARE SMART, they said.

WBW

Aaannddd.., what really happened?

We failed our IMD, Son. My breastmilk came out after 2 days. I never had a fridge full of expressed breastmilk. But in the end, we managed to finish 6 months of exclusive breastfeeding. Today, you’re 14 months old, still partially breastfed, and I think you’re alright.

I did thank my lecturer about the science and importance of breastfeeding. But mostly, I thanked fellow mommies who shared their IMD disappointments, just a few weeks before your birthday. Otherwise, I would’ve got really stressed and maybe failed breastfeeding. It gave me confidence that it’s okay for me to fail IMD or even fail to express breastmilk in the first 72 hours because many of them did and they continued breastfeeding later on.

So your wife needs to know that breastfeeding is really a ”hope for the best, prepare for the worst” trial. You eat well, stay healthy, seek reliable information, put your best effort to be ready to breastfeed, and most importantly, be happy. That means to be able to worry less about the undesired situation.

This is why I also thank mothers who failed to breastfeed completely. It made me think that even the kids given formula milk turned out okay. A friend of mine was not breastfed and she was the class valedictorian. The bottom line is, your “worst case” might not be that bad. There will be a way and if you have a good intention, Allah is there to show you.

 

She is not alone

Breastfeeding is mother-child business but you can always make contribution just like your father did. You could help her take care of herself. Drive her to her OBGYN. Show that you care and want to be part of it. Don’t put all the blame on her if things flop. You can share my story and tell her that most of (if not all) people I know failed their IMD. Your father once told me,

“You have been doing the best you can for our child. Whatever happens, we will face it together.”

And that worked for me 🙂

Happy World Breastfeeding Week.

IMG-20160806-WA0001

Categories: Awkward Mother, Doesn't Really Look Like A Doctor | Leave a comment

Let me write you the first letter

Dear Son,

They say a mother should become the first school for her child(ren). Well I’m not sure if I can teach you many things, because parenthood is never an easy game and I still have a lot to learn myself.

So I was thinking about making my school easier. Instead of me being the wise owl who gives you majestic advices, I think it’s better if we have a discussion on my stories. I want to share with you my opinions and views, or my experiences, or even my mistakes.  Anything we can learn from. The problem is, we can’t really do it now. There are subjects that need to be responded not just by “jajaja” or “bababa” or cries or a smile that melts my heart. But by the time you’re old enough to understand my stories, I’d have forgotten everything. Believe me, Son, I did try to keep a paper-based journal about you but my handwriting was so ugly it’s an eyesore just to look at it. Those kinds of notes are easy to get lost or damaged and you know I’m sloppy like that. Plus, they aren’t very eco-friendly.

So let me write to you through this blog. Every time I have a chance. I might not be doing it every day but I will try my best to do it as often as I could.

I am an awkward, inexperienced mother. Don’t expect too much astuteness from my stories. I do hope to tell you some deep, meaningful life lessons, but alas, I like trivial things. The only thing I aim to do is share my thoughts. It can be surprisingly useful or it can be a piece of outdated crap. You might agree or disagree with me. You are also allowed to think your mother is a weird woman and feel sorry for your father.

At the end of the day, My Dear Son, as you grow older, I just want us to have a good talk as much as possible. I want you to correct me if I’m wrong before I get too old and stubborn (well I’m stubborn now, but your work will be harder in the next 20 years). I want us to communicate. I love you and I want you to be a good person. And just in case I die sooner than medically calculated, at least you get to know me from what I wrote.

Enjoy your time being a baby. Life as an adult won’t let you sleep as much as you do now.

 

Much love,

Your not-yet-decided-what-to-call mother.

Categories: Awkward Mother | 1 Comment

Kebanggaan Berbahasa Tanggung

Pada suatu acara masak-masak di saluran TV lokal, sang koki yang berparas melayu oriental dan beraksen nusantara tulen memandu pemirsa membuat lasagna jamur. “Now, setelah olive oil, kita tambahkan salt. Okay, lasagna kita udah ready. Kita masukin cengkeh, pepper, bailey…. Kita melt butternya sekarang…”

Untuk orang yang baik hati dan tidak nyinyir, sekilas tidak ada yang salah dengan tayangan ini. Tapi sebagian kecil populasi mungkin ingin ikut berkomentar, “I feel gatal. Let’s siram the mas koki with air keras karena he doesn’t speak Bahasa Indonesia properly.” Baiklah, baiklah. Bukan sebagian kecil populasi. Itu saya saja yang nyinyir.

Tapi sesungguhnya, ini amat menyedihkan. Berdasarkan pengamatan selama ini, sepertinya rakyat Indonesia terjangkit sindroma kebanggaan berbahasa tanggung. Artinya, kemampuan bahasa internasionalnya tidak istimewa, sementara bahasa resminya sendiri masih belepotan, namun ada kebanggaan jika bisa mencampuradukkan penggunaannya dalam percakapan sehari-hari.

Kalau mau introspeksi diri, kita terkesan tidak terlalu menghormati Bahasa Indonesia. Ini paling mudah dilihat dari penggunaan tata bahasa dalam tulisan.

Gambar 1: “Rumah dikontrakan”. Memangnya dia salah apa?
Gambar 2: “Semoga di maklumi”. Di manakah maklumi berada?
Gambar 3: “Jangan! Buang sampah disini”.  Ini perlu ‘di maklumi’ juga?

Contoh-contoh kasus ini masih bisa dimaafkan. Mungkin saja penulisnya tidak lulus SD, sehingga tidak tahu hukum imbuhan, kata sambung, dan penggunaan tanda baca. Tapi tidak jarang kita jumpai kalimat yang tata bahasanya ngawur dalam surat edaran resmi setingkat perguruan tinggi atau bahkan kementerian.

Di sisi lain, belajar bahasa asing khususnya Bahasa Inggris itu sangat penting. Tapi haruskah penggunaannya dicampur-campur dengan bahasa Indonesia? Pada suasana informal, mungkin tidak terlalu masalah. Misalnya ngobrol dengan teman, komentar di media sosial, dan sebagainya. Tapi bagaimana dengan forum yang efek edukasinya pada masyarakat lebih luas? Berapa kali Anda mendengar pewarta berita menggunakan kalimat yang secara tata bahasa tidak benar?

Acara masak seperti yang saya tonton itu mungkin juga tergolong kasual. Tapi imbasnya bagi masyarakat cukup besar. Kita jadi tidak dipaksakan untuk berbahasa dengan benar. Malah dibiasakan pada persepsi bahwa berbahasa tanggung itu lebih keren. Lama-lama akibatnya terasa dalam dunia akademis. Kaum yang harusnya terpelajar seperti mahasiswa sampai guru besar universitas masih banyak yang tidak dapat menulis dalam Bahasa Indonesia yang baku, baik, dan benar. Saya jadi ingat, waktu sekolah dulu pun, nilai rapor saya untuk Bahasa Indonesia tidak pernah lebih tinggi daripada Bahasa Inggris karena aturannya kurang konsisten dan lebih sulit diterapkan dalam penggunaan sehari-hari. Mungkin pembaca bisa berbaik hati membantu saya mengoreksi kesalahan tata bahasa dalam artikel ini.

Kecintaan seseorang terhadap bangsanya dimulai dari hal-hal kecil. Saya rasa ada baiknya kita mulai mencoba berbahasa Indonesia yang baik dan benar. Setidaknya dalam dunia tulis menulis. Mudah-mudahan dengan begitu, nasionalisme bangsa Indonesia bisa tumbuh lebih besar dan lebih kuat.

Categories: Daily Rambler, Occasional Writer | Tags: | 1 Comment

#JeNeSuisPasCharlieHebdo. Are You Sure?

As a Muslim, I really don’t feel comfortable seeing Prophet Muhammad being mocked in the name of freedom of expression. Likewise, I also don’t feel comfortable hearing a preacher in the mosque labelling other religions as infidels. In general, I never feel comfortable seeing someone making comments on other people’s religions, especially when he or she tries to point out how incorrect other religions’ perspectives are.

image We all have the rights to feel that our choice of faith is the most correct one in the world. Similarly, we do have the freedom to express our pride of what we believe. You can be proud of how well the verses in your holy books teach you how to do good deeds. You can be proud of how loving your god is or how noble your prophets are. You can definitely spread any form of kindness and useful teachings from your religion. Anything that may promote world peace. However, you should never make comments on other people’s religions based on your opinions, especially when your comments are negative and potentially insulting.

You can, though, compare other religions to yours, but only within a homogenous group of your people (the ones with the same belief) as part of deepening the knowledge of your faith. Or alternatively, you attend an interfaith forum where everyone is required to openly learn about each other’s faith. You don’t share articles in social media or preach through a loudspeaker in a heterogeneous neighborhood mentioning that your religion is better than others, or that congratulating other religions’ holy days are equal to following infidelity. Not in Facebook, not in Twitter, not in Whatsapp groups, and not in any place where there are people who don’t share similar faiths with you.

It might seem trivial, but, please think again. It doesn’t matter whether you are a layman or a top-rated ustadz. If someone gets hurt or offended by your freely expresed minds, then what makes you different to Charlie Hebdo? You are making interpretations of what is correct and what is incorrect, as well as labels of who is wrong and who is right. While actually, it is God’s privilege to do that.

Sometimes we forget to put ourselves in other people’s shoes. We forget to calculate the impact of whatever comes out from our mouth. There are never enough lessons on “What would they feel if I do this?”. The old saying “Treat others as you want to be treated” is not always effective because every one of us applies different standards. I guess this is the reason why faiths should be regarded as a highly private matter.

Every religion is supposed to bring in peace upon Earth and I personally condemn any attacks in the name of it. On the other hand, I agree that there are limits to freedom of speech on sensitive issues. Certainly, the definition of ‘sensitive’ varies among different communities. The rule of to what extent certain discussion is appropriate and what is not is also very vague, depending on cultural and local values. It’s hard to measure, but that’s what makes humans different to animals; we are given the wisdom to do so. Hence technically, if you could spend some time to use your brain (and sense of humanity), you’d be able to feel it. After all, last two weeks’ tragedy should serve as a harsh reminder to us: to behave more like humans.

Categories: Uncategorized | 1 Comment

Republik Fotokopi Rangkap Tiga

Beberapa tahun terakhir ini saya banyak berurusan dengan birokrasi intansi pemerintahan. Mulai dari mengurus surat izin praktik (SIP) dokter, kunjungan puskesmas, perpanjangan paspor, sampai izin mendirikan bangunan (IMB).

Pelajaran yang dapat dipetik adalah:

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Birokrasi kita memang terkenal “ribet”. Jangan salah. Saya sering dilayani oleh petugas yang baik dan cekatan, tapi memang sistemnya mengharuskan kita bolak-balik ke kantor kelurahan/kecamatan/walikota/dsb untuk mengurus dokumen yang biasanya diproses secara manual atau dengan sistem online setengah matang. Saya paham bahwa birokrasi itu dibuat demi keteraturan. Jadi kalau segala keribetan itu mampu menghasilkan lebih banyak manfaat daripada mudaratnya, masih bisa diterima.

Tapi kalau dipikir-pikir lagi, keribetan ini, selain memakan waktu, juga tidak ramah lingkungan. Bolak-balik mengurus dokumen dengan kendaraan bermotor tentu menambah polusi. Istilahnya: eco-mudarat. Selain polusi, ada aspek lain yang lebih menarik sini. Yaitu kecenderungan menggunakan kertas.

Berdasarkan pengalaman pribadi, inilah kalimat-kalimat yang paling khas dari petugas instansi pemerintahan:

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Sedikit-sedikit fotokopi. Buat arsip ini buat arsip itu. Semuanya harus pakai kertas. Kertas. Kertas. Kertas.

Aneh sekali. Seperti kaum yang tidak tersentuh teknologi. Kalau masalahnya menjaga otentisitas dokumen, email attachment lebih tidak bisa diutak-atik. Kalau butuh salinan, kenapa tidak disimpan dalam bentuk softcopy PDF yang siap cetak? Memangnya seberapa sering kita butuh melihat salinan arsip? Kalau memang takut hilang karena diretas orang jahat, ya sekarang tumpukan kertas arsip itu juga rentan hilang, terendam banjir, kebakaran, atau dikencingi tikus.

Ketika dunia sudah semakin sadar akan kebijakan paperless sebagai salah satu upaya melestarikan lingkungan (lihat catatan Greenpeace tentang resolusi hijau tahun 2014), saya lihat pemerintah masih belum bisa menjadi teladan warga untuk menerapkan perilaku go green. Efeknya, masyarakat jadi tidak terbiasa mengasosiasikan perilaku sehari-hari dengan nasib hutan kita. Kita sering lupa bahwa bahan baku utama kertas dan tisu adalah kayu-kayu berkualitas serat tinggi seperti ramin yang juga berasal dari hutan Indonesia.*

Bagi sebagian besar kita, sepertinya tidak ada masalah dengan itu semua. Kita toh tidak membakar hutan, tidak melakukan illegal logging, tidak membuka lahan sawit. Kita hanya ngeprint, fotokopi, ngeprint, fotokopi. Paling berapa lembar sih?

Tidak banyak memang. Tapi semakin banyak orang yang berpikir demikian, semakin besar kebutuhan akan kertas, dan semakin banyak pohon yang harus ditebang. Nah, masalahnya, tidak semua produsen kertas menerapkan sistem yang forest-friendly.

***

Mulai dari hal kecil. Semampu kita.

Sebetulnya tidak perlu menunggu pemerintah untuk melakukan hal-hal yang baik. Kita bisa selalu mulai dengan hal-hal kecil, dari diri sendiri. Klise, tapi itu benar. Dalam hal pelestarian bumi, selalu ada kontribusi seremeh apa pun yang dapat kita berikan. Terkait pelestarian hutan, mungkin kita tidak dalam posisi yang berwenang untuk melakukan reboisasi, tebang pilih, atau memantau kinerja produsen pulp. Namun masih ada cara lain yang lebih mudah dilakukan. Di antaranya dengan menghemat penggunaan kertas dan produk-produk kayu, tak peduli dari perusahaan mana ia berasal. Misalnya:

  • Kalau membuat tugas kuliah, cetaklah pada kedua sisi halamannya. Apalagi kalau masih draf. Selain lebih murah, juga supaya tidak miris kalau berakhir demikian:

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  • Untuk pekerjaan sehari-hari, gunakan kertas bekas yang hanya terpakai pada satu sisinya untuk mencetak dokumen informal. Bahkan jika tidak perlu sekali, tidak usahlah dicetak segala. Optimalkan fungsi tablet. Jangan hanya untuk main flepi bird.
  • Kurangi pemakaian produk kayu lain seperti kantong, tisu, dan sumpit sekali pakai. Sering kali karena gratis, kita diberi atau bahkan meminta tambahan sumpit atau tisu di restoran, yang ternyata tidak dipakai.
  • Menularkan kesadaran itu ke lingkungan sekitar kita. Bisa ke orang-orang terdekat atau lewat sosial media. Banyak orang yang merusak lingkungan bukan karena mereka ingin, namun karena mereka tidak sadar. Misalnya dengan ikut lomba blog Hutan Kita dengan tema Protect Paradise dari Greenpeace ini. Hampir tidak keluar biaya dan kalau menang hadiahnya jalan-jalan ke hutan ketemu monyet! 😀

Kita tidak bisa hidup tanpa kertas. Yang bisa kita lakukan adalah menggunakannya dengan bijak. Poin-poin di atas sudah bukan barang baru. Tapi entah kenapa belum semua orang mengamalkannya.

Tidak perlu menunggu pemerintah. Tidak perlu menunggu siapa-siapa. Mungkin kita ragu bahwa aksi kecil kita ini akan ada gunanya. Tapi saya percaya bahwa akumulasi hal-hal kecil dapat menghasilkan sesuatu yang besar. Dan jika hal kecil itu bisa menyelamatkan hutan kita, apa alasan kita tidak melakukannya? 🙂

 

 

 

 

*) Untuk informasi lebih lengkap, silakan kunjungi website Greenpeace atau klik link berikut.

http://www.greenpeace.org/seasia/id/campaigns/melindungi-hutan-alam-terakhir/app1/ramin/

http://www.greenpeace.org/seasia/id/blog/resolusi-hijau-untuk-tahun-baru-2014/blog/47794/

http://www.greenpeace.org/seasia/id/blog/APP-kertas-moratorium/blog/40593/

Categories: Daily Rambler, Occasional Writer | Tags: , , | 3 Comments

Tuesday Thinking

There are three main reasons why people don’t appreciate your existence.

1) You are not good enough
2) They take you for granted
3) They simply don’t need you

This is a tricky area where you need to be able to tell the difference. Once you know which case you are in, then you get to decide whether you want to:

1) Improve and make yourself better
2) Tolerate for some time
3) Walk away from their life forever

Normally you would start from no.1 until you become better so that they acknowledge how good you are. lt’s all for your own sake and the advantage is definitely on you. Well, perhaps on them too. So this is most likely a win-win solution.

Then it’s down to no.2. Because no matter how hard you try, you understand that even good people can be anal openings sometimes. They forget to appreciate you and treat you like crap. But you believe it’s ephemeral and you can still put up with them. In this case you can either stay there waiting patiently for a miracle, try to talk to them, or temporarily disappear to give them time to reflect. You tolerate. Until you can’t do it anymore.

Then when all the limits are crossed and you feel like you’ve had enough, perhaps it’s time to do some rethinking. Maybe it is the case no. 3 and thus you should act accordingly. If those people don’t need you in the first place, what in the world could make them deserve you? And if you can live without them, what makes you stay? 🙂

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Your intention is among the most important things.

So it better be good.

No matter what you do, no matter how you do it, you’ll find bumpy roads along the way.
You will encounter hardships and bad days.
You will face the fact that your plan A, B, and C didn’t work.
You can’t obtain everyone’s blessing and expect the universe to always have your back.

But that’s how you’ll ever learn why seatbelts are important.
That’s how you will appreciate every second you spend on good times.
That’s how you will discover another alphabet from the remaining 23 that may become your best plan.
And that’s why you seek Allah’s blessing, not anyone else’s.

Sometimes it’s your fear that gets in your way. And often it’s not necessary.

Crossroads don’t have to bring in confusion. Each path may lead to equal joy and sorrow. Why all the frustration on having to choose one of them?

You do a cautious math, listen to people well, and do what you think is right. If you know you’re doing a good deed, you know exactly what you have to do 🙂

Categories: Daily Rambler | Leave a comment

Je suis allée à Jayapura and why I’m writing in in french.

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Le mois de Novembre dernier, je suis allée à Jayapura pour travailler. Ce jeudi, je vais passer un examen de français niveau A2. C’est pourquoi maintenant j’ecris un blog post ici en français. Pour pratiquer.
Donc, comme d’habitude, je vous voudrais présenter dix faits au hasard que j’ai noté durant mon voyage.
1. Les choses en Papouasie sont plus chères que ceux de Jakarta.
2. Je remercie Dieu pour l’existence de Telkomsel.
3. C’était la première et la dernière fois que j’ai mangé Papeda. C’est trop bizzare pour moi.
4. J’adore l’autres cuisines comme ‘sayur bunga pepaya’ et toutes les poissons.
5. Le lac Sentani est très très beau. Mais malheuresement, je ne pouvais pas prendre une bonne photo de lui. Il pleuvait et il y avait beaucoup de nuages là-bas
6. Je devrais visiter Wamena à l’avenir. Je voudrais prendre une photo avec les hommes Papouasie qui portent des kotekas.
7. Tous les gens que j’ai rencontrés étaient gentils et sympathiques. Mais ils nous ont aussi dit que les émeutes et les violences sexuelles étaient assez fréquentes. Vous devriez être prudent surtout si vous êtes une femme et voyagez seule. Vous pourriez aller en groupe et rester loin des gens ivres.
8. Je ne sais pas exactement et je dois vérifier. Mais je suis sûre que les gens qui vendaient Bolu Manokwari (une sorte de pain, souvenir célebrè pour les tourists), étaient clairement d’origine chinoise. C’est intéressant.
9. Le billet d’avion à destination Jayapura est coûteux! C’est aussi cher que le vol à Melbourne.
10. J’aurais dû acheter plus Batik de Papouasie là-bas. Ils sont merveilleux. Maintenant, je le regrette un peu.
Comme toujours, parce que c’était un travail, jen’ai pas eu de la chance d’être une vraie touriste. J’espère que je pourrai visiter Papouasie nouveau. La prochaine fois, je devrais explorer Raja Ampat et d’autres endroits exotiques là-bas!
P.S. Excusez mon mauvais français. S’il vous plaît corrigez moi si j’ai fait des erreurs cela m’aidera à m’améliorer. Merci!

_______________________________

(edited, terima kasih Oom Patrice!)

Categories: Doesn't Really Look Like A Doctor, Lazy Traveler | Tags: , , , , , | Leave a comment

“Hate the Attitudes, Not the Person”

That’s what my mother keeps saying. Sounds simple but it’s not easy.

I remember my friends said they disliked someone because of her obnoxious attitudes. That one particular attitude was so obnoxious that they could not appreciate another list of good qualities in her. Everything she said or did became irrelevantly wrong, all the time.

Recently, I’ve been noticing that some colleagues used to show their abundant affection towards our new governor and vice governor, because of the fact that they brought in new changes, possessed clean and discipline images, etc. But recently, when Governor Jokowi created a policy that created troubles for health care providers and when Vice Governor Ahok made a-not-very-wise public statement about doctors and hospitals, these colleagues of mine flew into rage and spread hate comments on social media.*

I understand that Jokowi’s new policy is somewhat premature and potentially creating problems within the health system. I understand that Ahok shouldn’t be signaling a statement that negatively labels doctors and hospitals: that they are not pro poor people and that they don’t give standard service. I too, must say that this is unbelievably disheartening.

It’s as if they’re, especially Ahok, (perhaps unintentionally) inviting people to hate the whole population of doctors and health providers in Indonesia.

I have always wondered what the joy people find in hating others is. As well as attacking others, hurting others, and watching others suffer.

I don’t want people to hate all of us. I don’t deny that doctors with bad attitudes exist and that they should be disciplined. Yet there are doctors who do good practices. Who treat patients for free. Who are not paid and sometimes even pay for the patients’ medication. Who work for a 36-hours sleepless shift because there are too many patients to take care for. Who put patients’ needs ahead of their own. Who get sued for malpractices and defamed because patients’ family, NGOs, and media don’t understand Steven Johnson Syndrome.

But I rarely find media mention these facts a lot. Sure thing, because good news don’t sell.

People can choose to hate the bad doctors. Or even more ideally, the attitude of those bad doctors. But please, just be wise and don’t hate everyone in a white coat.**

I don’t want to hate the whole person of Jokowi and Ahok either. I voted for them and I have a lot of hopes and respect for them. I love that they are hardworking, and smart, and down to earth, and strict to any violation of laws, and Ahok is cute (wait what).

So people may hate bad attitudes of several doctors and hope that those attitudes would be fixed. And doctors may hate Jokowi-Ahok’s actions towards this particular issue and hope that those actions would be fixed.

Just because there are sweetened cherries that you don’t like on top of your cake, doesn’t mean the whole cake is not worth eating.***

 

 

 

 

*) Not to mention some other politicians’ judgmental statements. Well if you’re curious, just google these keywords: “Ribka Tjiptaning” “

**) For there are drugstore attendants who dress like doctors, but it’s out of context. I’m just trying to be funny here but only a few of you would get it.

***) This expression might only apply to me. I detest sweetened cherry (not the fresh ones). I would normally eat the base, icing, and every element of the cake but leave the cherries for someone else.

Categories: Daily Rambler, Doesn't Really Look Like A Doctor | 2 Comments

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